Monday, July 9, 2012

I'm afraid

It's now less then three weeks till race day and I am in minor freak out mode.  This is a big race for me.  A half ironman?  Am I crazy?  When I set out on this triathlon journey, I only had a goal of doing a triathlon, any triathlon, probably a try-a-tri, or maybe a sprint.

Part of the fear is real, and valid.  It's one thing to go into a race with a goal "to finish", but when that race has cut off times, you automatically have a time goal if you want to finish.  And quite honestly, I am afraid of those cut off times.

The swim: I'm not too afraid of the swim cut off, but I really have no idea how fast I am in open water.  I've done two Olympic distance races (1500 metres), with times of 37:42 and 43:09.  Ironically, the longer time was the race that I think I swam better and faster in.  Even so, adding another 400 metres on, I should still be good to finish in 1:10.  Should.  I'm kind of hoping I can finish quicker then that so that I can be out of transition and onto the bike within an hour.

Because what I am afraid of  is the bike cut off.

5 hours from the start of the race.  So, if I manage to get on the bike within an hour, that gives me about 4 hours on the bike.  And I'm just not very fast.  Yesterday I rode about 100 kilometers.  I accidentally stopped my garmin at one point, so only recorded 96.  96 km, which took me 4 hours and 10 minutes.  The bike on the race course is 95km, and if I go that speed, I might not make it.

Close.  Very close.

Now granted, I did run 19 km the day before.  I've also been hit with yet another cold.  It was also a bloody hot day out.  At the very least, I can avoid doing a long run the day before my race.  No guarantees about what viruses my children will give me or what the weather will be like.

So, I should be able to make the bike cut off.  Should.

But I'm afraid.

I'm afraid because I know it will be close.  And, I know that a flat tire or a strong headwind on the point to point course could be my undoing.

I'm afraid.

I'm going to do it anyways.

13 comments:

  1. The wind is mostly good on this course, blowing us where we want to be. Plus it is net downhill. You will really need to stay off your brakes and take advantage. I think you will be quicker on the bike than you think. The swim buoys were really far apart the year I did it so sighting is important or having a reliable pair of feet to follow that won't take the scenic route. It will be fun! Just as long as the run isn't too hot, that's what I worry about.

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  2. Are you doing the Calgary half ironman at the end of the month? If so, I am volunteering on the run course, so I will make sure to look for you and cheer extra loud!!

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  3. Altho I know next to nothing about tri's, I am certain you will make the cut-offs. Fear is natural and it will help you work towards ensuring you make the cut-offs. Good luck!!

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  4. I think you will bike faster than you think given the race day adrenaline.

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  5. Relax!!! You will be just fine. I agree, you will likely bike faster than you think with race day adrenaline. Just got out there and do your best, that's all you can do!!

    (PS I'm afraid of the cut off times too - my race is Sunday)...Let's do this thing!!

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  6. I don't recall that we had any cutoff's during my 70.3. However I would have made those cutoff's and I'm POSITIVE you will!

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  7. i have 100000000% confidence that you will do GREAT. so looking forward to cheering you on virtually...i totally admire you! still haven't taken swimming lessons (argh!) but will...one day! :)

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  8. Courage is all about facing what we are afraid of and doing it anyway. I'm sure you'll do great. Just keep moving. Take what the day brings and know that the journey to get here is so much more important than the result.

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  9. Yeah. Like the others said, I think you will make the bike cutoff. I am sure the long run affected your time. I know what you mean about having anxiety about it though. I say just start swimming and keep moving forward from there.

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  10. Visualize yourself breezing through the bike with plenty of time to spare. Mind over matter.

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  11. Visualize yourself breezing through the bike with plenty of time to spare. Mind over matter.

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  12. Visualize yourself breezing through the bike with plenty of time to spare. Mind over matter.

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  13. OMG Deb. I could have written this post myself, although my race is in less than 2 weeks and also a half ironman. My oly swim times were 40 min and 34 mins and my long bike rides are at about the same pace as you. I'm worried due to the lack of training at several points in the past 2 months. But you know what, we are both gonna rock it. WE have this. We will do this!

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